I heard more words I didn’t want to hear. “He will not be leaving the hospital.”

My husband’s doctors tried to tell me what the near future would be. My husband’s body would not ever go home again.

I knew way down deep that the doctors were speaking the truth, but I did not want proof of my thoughts. My ears heard their words, but my brain had a difficult time processing the words, and my heart did not want to accept them.

The doctors, in telling me their prognosis, were asking me for a plan. If my husband wasn’t leaving the hospital and he was hooked up to machines helping him live, what was I going to do about this?

Nothing. I refused to make a plan because, to do that, my brain had to function properly with the words the doctors had spoken. I had to truly hear and understand what they were saying. That wasn’t happening. Also, I knew that God had His plan. I wanted that plan, not mine, not the doctors’ plan. I had watched our daughter die. I knew what could happen. I knew a person could die without me having any input. I knew God was in control of life and of death and that I wasn’t. God numbers our days; we don’t. “Since his days are determined, the number of his months is with Thee, and his limits Thou hast set so that he cannot pass.” (Job 14:5)

So, I waited. On God. And His plan.

Have you heard some words lately that you didn’t want to hear?

• You’re fired.

• I don’t love you anymore.

• There is something wrong with your child.

• Your house burned down.

• We found a mass in your body which is malignant.

• Your loved one has died.

What is our best response when we hear words that cut the passage of understanding from our ears to our brains and hearts?

PRAYER.

God wants us to cry out to Him. He wants us to seek Him.

Is it hard? Yes, it can be, especially when we mistakenly believe God is to be blamed.

Yes, it is hard, when we do not have the words because our brain cannot process what we heard.

So, STOP. Stop right there and hear what was said. Don’t move to the next step. Take the time you need to understand what was said.

Then, PROCESS. Explore your thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Allow them to surface. Acknowledge all of them. It’s okay to have whatever emotions we have. Examine those feelings. Tell God each emotion that comes to you. He gave us those emotions, so He knows about them and wants to hear about them.

God understands when all we might be able to do is groan and cry. Jesus and the Holy Spirit are both interceding for us before our Father.

“And in the same way [with hope and perseverance] the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who search the hearts [Jesus] knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.” Romans 8:26-27

Pray for His wisdom. Ask Him in faith.

“When you respond in faith, a crisis becomes an opportunity for God to demonstrate what He can do on your behalf.” (Bob & Debby Gass)

We may not know what His plan is or will be. We can be confident, though, in His character and His purpose.

• We know He wants good for us (Romans 8:28).

• He will answer us when we seek Him (Psalm 34:4).

• He holds our hand when we stumble (Psalm 37:24).

• He is making us more like Christ (1 Peter 2:21).

Read the Bible.

“Your words have helped the tottering to stand, and you have strengthened feeble knees.” (Job 4:4) . God’s words help strengthen us when we are unstable due to the hard news we have received.

“Then they cried out to the LORD in their trouble; He delivered them out of their distresses.” This verse is repeated four times is Psalm 107. God delivers us when we are lost, rebellious, and sick, and when we are reeling in a storm.

“For he will never be shaken; the righteous will be remembered forever. He will not fear evil tidings; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.” Psalm 112:6-7

Are some words hard to hear? Yes. But when I hear words that my brain cannot comprehend, I know my God will never allow me to fall headlong on my face, to be unsteady, or be lost without His plan.

(As I am writing the final draft of this post, the news of a helicopter crash in California has begun to appear on my phone, social media, and news outlets. The helicopter contained an American sports hero and his daughter. The reports naturally gravitated toward this hero. My heart hurt for his family, of course, but my mind also went to the families of the other victims. They were just “ordinary” people that the rest of the world didn’t know and weren’t discussing. The families heard the same words that the hero’s family heard. However, the rest of the world wasn’t rushing to praise their family members who had passed away. Their shock is still the same. They all need our prayers.)