Last night, a song caught my attention playing at the end of a television show. The words I heard were, “If you don’t look back, you will never know.” The correct words were different, however, and have an opposite message; but that is neither here nor there. Perhaps, God used what I heard to motivate me into the obedience of writing.

The message worked; I’m back.

I have to confess to you that writing what God has done through my trials is not easy for me.

Looking back and remembering forces the pain back to the surface of my emotions. That’s hard! Going through the initial pain is enough for me. I don’t like pain. I don’t like sorrow. I don’t like tears. I like to see the positive side of life. But with the positive comes the negative. (I think there’s a scientific rule there somewhere, maybe.)

The word, remember, means “to bring to mind or think of again” (according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary).

God has asked His people over and over to remember. We are told to remember what He has done, to remember to keep the Sabbath holy, to remember and obey His commands, and to remember our past and how God sustained us.

Looking back can result in deceptive memories. The Israelites were told by God to remember how they felt while in slavery in Egypt; they wanted to remember the good cucumbers they had eaten. God wanted them to remember that the one Holy God was the One who delivered them from their slavery; the people believed a golden calf delivered them. We have to remember the truth. (Deuteronomy 5:15)

Looking back can also be painful. We look back and see the times we sinned against God and hurt other people. We see our regrets for stepping out of God’s will at the time. We have to remember Jesus paid the price for our sins. (Ephesians 2:12-13)

Looking back can be comforting. God will always remember His promises (Genesis 9:15-16). We can meditate on those promises. We can remember the good things God has given us and done for us. We can remember the strength He gave us when we were too weak to continue. We can focus on how He sustained us, how He gave us hope when we gave up, and how He encouraged us with a timely word from another person. We have to remember God’s faithful love. (Psalm 52:8)

God spoke to me through His Word about this very subject a few months ago. He told me to meditate (to focus one’s thoughts on) on His wonders.

Psalm 119:27b says, “For I will meditate on Your wonders.”

The word, wonder, means (according to Merriam-Webster) “a cause of astonishment or admiration; rapt attention or astonishment at something awesomely mysterious or new to one’s experience.”

I have to admit there have been many causes of astonishment and new experiences in my life.

However, I have filled my days this year with busyness instead of wonder. My fault!

During my recent trip to Italy with a friend, I was boldly made aware of this fact. When in a beautiful and historic country, I always want to see as much as possible; so, I fill my itinerary leaving very little time to sit and wonder. (My plan to spend time on contemplation while traveling on the trains in Italy did not happen; I missed too much time questioning if I was on the right train or if I would arrive on time for my connecting train. Best laid plans…) In Italy, I saw some amazing wonders of creation and art, along with history. I took a photo and moved on to the next place. I forgot to focus my thoughts on what God was showing me. Unfortunately, a picture does not compare to seeing His beautiful nature He created for us. I have regrets in pushing too fast to see too much.

Busyness has let me empty and tired. My spirit longs for meditation. Just like my travel days when I pushed my body to extreme fatigue, my spirit without time with God is pushed to fatigue. It is now time to follow Him once again in obedience to wonder, to meditate, to be still, and to look back.

So, what are the wonders God has done for me?

I will never know unless I look back and remember. I hope you continue with me in my journey. I also hope you search for God’s wonders in your own story.